I love all the monkeys equally but each endears themselves to my heart differently.
So, like every parent, I love the monkeys equally and have no favorite.
So, let me tell you of my favorite monkey.
Snoopy!
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| viaNot my Snoopy but close enough.. |
Snoopy is a brindle black mouth cur.
Snoopy is a monkey of many talents.
He can do impersonations.
His favorite impersonation is of a lap dog.
An 80lb lap dog.
He does work diligently on his talent.
Relentlessly.
He was working on a new impersonation,
a goat.
Which lead to the discovery of this magic trick.
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| Hey Rocky! Watch me pull a rabbit out of my .... |
He came into the living room and started to lick his...
Butt.
I had to look, he doesn't doo that. Usually.
Then he pulls something out of his...
Butt!
I jump up and grab a tissue because,
I SWEAR TO GOD HE WAS GOING TO RE-EAT IT!!!
He then sits back down and and is repeating this trick without much success with his...
Butt.
Practice makes perfect, you know.
I see now, something blue hanging out his...
Butt.
This is now causing some interest from the other monkeys. This is a danger signal.
I try to cajole Snoopy into the bathroom for some privacy. This takes a few minutes because, he is really intent about producing this blue thing from his...
Butt.
So, you must realize that he needs some help with his...
Butt.
So, with my naked fingers I grasp the blue thing gently and proceed to pull.
It snaps out and I get sprayed with some fecal material from his...
Butt.
UGH!
Oh, look! Anther blue thingie from his...
Butt.
I repeat the process, but look away. This time.
This is what I learned this day.
Audience participation in a magic trick is sometimes messy.
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| via |
AND Snoopy is not allowed to practice any more impersonations without prior Chick approval.
Oh, you probably doo not want to know what the blue thingies were. If you go back and look at Bullwinkle, the answer is there. Coincidence? I think not!
Ps. No monkeys were harmed in the making of this post. Butt, the Chick did need a shower.
The poor monkey. What would have been even funnier is if he had 'gassed' it up like a rooster head. Pictures would have been necessary. And possibly a video. I've given him a goal to work toward. You're welcome.
ReplyDeleteIf that had happened I would have been laughing 'til I cried. Tooo Funny!!
DeleteHe ate a rubber glove? That doesn't surprise me. My Otto eats fleece blankets, which either get puked or pooped. You don't want to know how many blankets he's ruined in his five years of life.
ReplyDeleteWow! Is all I have to say. I think Otto is pretty clever. As the blanket comes out it automatically wipes his butt! Good Boy!
DeleteMy Papillon does Elvis impersonations. I guess pulling stuff out is better than sticking your hand in a horsey butt.
ReplyDeleteOkay, Elvis impression?! I would love to see this! Dut first is it fat Elvis or young Elvis and is there a cape involved?
DeleteGLOVES!!!?
ReplyDeleteLinda
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