Chickens

I miss owning chickens.
I swear I'm on the verge.
I almost hit the click button.
I would have ordered about 40.
I am nuts!

I mean, where would they live?
Where would they grow up?
What would eat them first?
Coyotes?
Hawks?
Monkeys?

So, yesterday when I was looking for bed plans....

O M G!!!

I found this....

Step One.

Brood Cabinet

Step Two.

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Step Three.

awwwww

Step Four.

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And finally,

Step Five.

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OOoo, OOoo, I almost forgot!!

Step Six!

I am promising myself, that I will not buy chicks until I make the brood cabinet. And I want a bed more than chickens.

Mostly.

 

I Really Need A Bed!

Well, I'm back.

Sorry about the hiatus. My son was here, and well, time spent with him is the most important thing to me.

Now, before your feelings get hurt, I think about you all every day. At least once when a blog idea hits and then at least one other time. When I feel guilty for not writing. But because of the hiatus, I am constipated.

Not, can't poop, constipated. It's a mental constipation. I've written multiple blogs in my head, it's stuffed. And I just have a little bitty hole for it to fall out. Yes, it's true. I do have a hole in my head.

Anywhoo... I need a bed.

I would L O V E to have a hanging bed but the construction of this house is not conducive to that.

So, I have found a few ideas.

And these are them.

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I can't do white, it's something to do with owning 5 monkeys. I'm thinking an espresso finish.

How about a foot bench to match?

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And of course, matching nightstands.

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I am going to be a train soon.

Silent Sunday 062313

 

Onions and Cabbage Patches

Just so you know, my boy is a city boy, much to my chagrin. This was never more so evident, until one day last week.

I live wayyyy out in the countryside and I love it. My boy lives in NYC and he loves it.

When we decided to go on our little adventure Saturday, he drove over to my house. I got in the car and as we were driving by miles of fields, I would point out what was growing out there.

Corn.

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Beans.

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Corn.

Hay.

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Onions.

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When I pointed out the onion field, he said, "Onions grow on the ground?"

Now, I must confess this child of mine is smart and the funniest person I know. But what kind of mother am I that I never told him how onions grow. I would think that even schools taught the basics of agriculture.

I have concerns.

I'm cutting this post short, because if he doesn't know where onions come from, I had better explain the whole "Where do babies come from?" and F A S T !

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A Woman Named Mickey

I have two great fears. My primary fear is never to be mentioned. Superstition or not, I will never utter that fear.

My second fear, is the terrible process of aging. I don't mean my vanity of wrinkles. I've had those since the ripe old age of fifteen.
What I am talking about is the loss of function in body or mind.

I have access to many places, some cool as hell and some just hell. I have a few homes for the aged or disabled and some with the combination of the two.

Money makes a difference.

I was at a moderate income aging facility. The patients had a variety of ailments. Some slept in easy chairs, some stared at the television. Some wander the halls asking where the elevator is or where someone they used to know has gone.

All this crushes my heart. Sitting here typing, my eyes are welling up.

I don't want this to be me. I don't want someone to be changing my diaper. Or being bedridden, so when I soil myself, I have to be rolled over and someone must clean me. At what age do you lose dignity? I am a modest person, just the thought of this makes me cringe.

What happens if my mind goes and my body stays? What if I no longer recognize those I love? What if I travel between two realities, the present and the past? I don't want this.

While I was at this facility, I sat in the reception area to do my paperwork. A handsome, older woman approached me. I don't recall the full conversation, but she sat next to me and we had a fine conversation. I liked her immediately. Her name is Mickey, she told me, like the mouse. I laughed and said like Mickey Mantle, as part of our conversation revolved around baseball.

In 1994, DiMaggio’s Yankees teammate (for one season – 1951), Mickey Mantle, also came to meet the other “MM.”

When I left I made a mental note to look her up the next time I came around.

When I went back, I asked for Mickey and they directed me to here room. She wasn't there and I was genuinely disappointed.
When I mentioned that I had just missed her to the receptionist, here came Mickey around the corner. I did not expect her to remember me, as over a month had passed. But I greeted her by name.

She asked who I was and I explained that I had met her the previous month and had enjoyed our conversation and wanted to make sure that I said hello to her. She was so pleased.

Then the nature of her disease appeared. She asked the receptionist who I was. The receptionist explained and then her agitation of not being able to remember me set in. There is more to the story but this is enough to tell.

Mickey made me think. She obviously was a great lady to know. Where is her family? Are they local?
It's really none of my business.

I will meet Mickey again.

Next time, I will act as if it is the first time we have met.

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Let America Be America Again

Let America Be America Again 

by Langston Hughes

Let America be America again.
Let it be the dream it used to be.
Let it be the pioneer on the plain
Seeking a home where he himself is free.

(America never was America to me.)

Let America be the dream the dreamers dreamed--
Let it be that great strong land of love
Where never kings connive nor tyrants scheme
That any man be crushed by one above.

(It never was America to me.)

O, let my land be a land where Liberty
Is crowned with no false patriotic wreath,
But opportunity is real, and life is free,
Equality is in the air we breathe.

(There's never been equality for me,
Nor freedom in this "homeland of the free.")

Say, who are you that mumbles in the dark?
And who are you that draws your veil across the stars?

I am the poor white, fooled and pushed apart,
I am the Negro bearing slavery's scars.
I am the red man driven from the land,
I am the immigrant clutching the hope I seek--
And finding only the same old stupid plan
Of dog eat dog, of mighty crush the weak.

I am the young man, full of strength and hope,
Tangled in that ancient endless chain
Of profit, power, gain, of grab the land!
Of grab the gold! Of grab the ways of satisfying need!
Of work the men! Of take the pay!
Of owning everything for one's own greed!

I am the farmer, bondsman to the soil.
I am the worker sold to the machine.
I am the Negro, servant to you all.
I am the people, humble, hungry, mean--
Hungry yet today despite the dream.
Beaten yet today--O, Pioneers!
I am the man who never got ahead,
The poorest worker bartered through the years.

Yet I'm the one who dreamt our basic dream
In the Old World while still a serf of kings,
Who dreamt a dream so strong, so brave, so true,
That even yet its mighty daring sings
In every brick and stone, in every furrow turned
That's made America the land it has become.
O, I'm the man who sailed those early seas
In search of what I meant to be my home--
For I'm the one who left dark Ireland's shore,
And Poland's plain, and England's grassy lea,
And torn from Black Africa's strand I came
To build a "homeland of the free."

The free?

Who said the free? Not me?
Surely not me? The millions on relief today?
The millions shot down when we strike?
The millions who have nothing for our pay?
For all the dreams we've dreamed
And all the songs we've sung
And all the hopes we've held
And all the flags we've hung,
The millions who have nothing for our pay--
Except the dream that's almost dead today.

O, let America be America again--
The land that never has been yet--
And yet must be--the land where every man is free.
The land that's mine--the poor man's, Indian's, Negro's, ME--
Who made America,
Whose sweat and blood, whose faith and pain,
Whose hand at the foundry, whose plow in the rain,
Must bring back our mighty dream again.

Sure, call me any ugly name you choose--
The steel of freedom does not stain.
From those who live like leeches on the people's lives,
We must take back our land again,
America!

O, yes,
I say it plain,
America never was America to me,
And yet I swear this oath--
America will be!

Out of the rack and ruin of our gangster death,
The rape and rot of graft, and stealth, and lies,
We, the people, must redeem
The land, the mines, the plants, the rivers.
The mountains and the endless plain--
All, all the stretch of these great green states--
And make America again!

VIA

 

Saturday Celebrity Sighting

So, as I mentioned in yesterday's post, my boy and I ended up at a portion of the local Pride Fest. That's what it is called. Not the Gay Pride Fest, just Pride Fest. When I heard about it on the radio advertised as a Pride Fest, I was a little confused. Was it just a regular fest, where everyone can dress like peacocks and get pissed off because I am staring or was it a Gay Pride Fest, where my delicate sensibilities would have to be left back at the car.

Was the Pride Fest, Gay or not?!

Bilingual... I will let the joke rest right here. Thank you very much!  via

Well, when the DJ's brought on a guest spokesman, a guy named "Flaming" or "Flamboyant", those pieces of the puzzle fell into place. I'm smart like that!

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Suffice to say the whole gay pride fest is not to my taste.

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 For that matter, neither is a redneck chili cook off, but I digress.

This post is about a HUGE SUPERSTAR SIGHTING!

Right here in Denver, of all places! And at the Pride Fest. Trust me it was way gay.

I was staring at a lesbian's shoes, kinda. They were black and neon green Ugg-type boots. Where the hell do you buy such things? I even Googled them. Nothing, nada, zip!

See how distracting the Ugg's were? I can't even keep a coherent thought.

Dammit!

SO, WE WERE WALKING DOWN THE STREET.

And I saw this a few feet ahead of us.

Dammit! Typing the word feet made me think of those boots again. Hold on, gotta Google and make sure they are not anywhere on the net. BRB.

Okay, back. They are not boots. They are leg warmers and here they are.

CRAP ON A STICK, THEY ARE DISTRACTING!!

A cross between a raccoon and Frankenstein? 

Radioactive zebra Sasquatch? 

Giant Alien caterpillars?

What are they??

OMG!!! 

CAN I FINALLY GET BACK TO MY POST?

SHEESH!!

Anywhoo... we saw this.

Oh, for pete's sake! Not one photo of the back of his head! I even looked up the back of Ellen Degeneres' head. Oh, and the irony is not lost on me!

Here's his damn picture.

Rod Stewart via

Yes, Rod Stewart. I wasn't sure it it were him, so I listened to him speak. Well, he does have an English accent. I had to have a better look so I steered the boy next to the wall. Nah, that's not him.

Besides, why would Rod Stewart be at a Don't mention the word Gay Pride Fest? I could understand Cher, but Rod? Is Rod a closet fag hag? Can a man even be a fag hag? No, I think that would just make him gay.

Anywhoo....

But wait! Now that I had to look up his picture for this post, I'm not sure if it was him or not.

So, maybe it was an impersonator? But, I must say, if I were to be a Rod Stewart impersonator, I think I would choose a younger Rod! 

Pfft...no pun intended.

 

Saturday, A Great Day

Saturday was a great day!

I spent the day with my boy!

We had no plans other than to go to the Denver Flea Market, however we crammed a ton of fun in just a few hours.

Picture courtesy of my boy!

First stop was the Mile High Flea Market. I dressed as if I were going to market at  Campo de' Fiori in Rome. I wore a long red dress, sandals and a wide brim hat. Yes, I was rockin' the look and even got a compliment from an Asian woman vendor.

With all the hype that I had read about this flea market, I was a little disappointed. It was small. I say small, in comparison to the Swap Shop in South Florida. I mean, come on! We walked up and down every aisle, and my feet didn't even hurt at the end of our time there!

We did come away winners, though! I bought an ugly Aeropostle bag, it was a necessity as I wanted a bag but couldn't find what I wanted and I was sick of my lipstick hanging around in my bra.
Bag was originally, $32. I bought it for $12.

Note the blue shoes. That's my boy!

But the HUGE deal of the day, was for my boy! He found not one but two 35mm cameras. The vendor wanted $50. That was a huge deal, yet, my boy walked away with those two MINT condition cameras for $32. That's not each! But $32 for both! SCORE!!!

We ate Philly Cheese sandwiches, they were premade. So, of course disappointing, but edible. We also ordered a frozen lemonade. To our surprise, it was not a slushie type drink. Ooooo, and too  sweeeeet!

What I gathered from visiting the flea market, is that if you need umbrellas designed as animals, complete with fabric ears, this is the place to go. If you need a hat, this is the place to go. We bought two hats, both camo bucket style. Both hats for the boy. The first hat was too small, so we found the right size at another vendor and purchased that as well. I guess I now own a camo bucket hat.

I'm sexy and I know it hat. via

Then we cruised down to Denver. I wanted to visit the little Asian market off of Federal and Alameda. At the Asian "home store" I bought a money frog for my boy and one for me. I also bought a dragon figurine. My boy is a dragon, I am a ram. If you follow that kind of stuff. The love of all things Asian can be traced back to my mother and my paternal grandmother. Neither are Asian.

Then I dragged to boy over to the Asian food market. I bought dried black fungus, dried shiitake mushrooms, a long handled mesh colander and MOCHI!!

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Me lovee MOCHI!!!!

Okay, I love mochi. I must make mochi. I have pinned mochi recipes. If you would like to see them on pinterest- click here! http://pinterest.com/NormalNuttiness/mochi/

Next stop was:

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Again, I had heard hype on this and was eager to see what I could see. My over all feeling for this store is, meh. No big deal. Nothing that struck my fancy. I won't be back.

Then we cruised on down to IKEA.

Picture courstey of my boy!

I'm really not an IKEA fan.  However, I did know the first rule of visiting IKEA.

EAT THE SWEDISH MEATBALLS!

So, after walking the whole furniture floor, we went to try the meatballs.

Not only did we try the meatballs, but we ordered the salmon lasagna, the barbecue ribs and the chocolate cake.

Boy, liked the ribs very much and I thought they were tasty. The cake was great! But I would never recommend the salmon lasagna or the famous Swedish meatball. However, if you like greasy meatballs have at it!

We then moseyed on downstairs and bought a huge picture frame. My boy, who is a professional photographer, is promising me one of his photos. I don't know what it is, yet. But I am promised that after my death, it will hang in the Metropolitan Museum of Art.

Denver clock tower. Courtesy of my boy.

Next stop was back up to downtown Denver. We walked to the 16th Street Mall to hit Barnes and Noble. As we walked and walked and walked, I remembered that the Pride Festival was this weekend. Now I am all about expressing individuality, however I recall back in the day you had to pay to see this type of freak show. 'Nuff said about that.

Anywhoo, I bought a Carl Hiaasen book and we headed back out to the car. So we walked and walked and walked. When we got back, I had a parking ticket.

WHAT!!???

We still had twenty three minutes left on the meter! Oh, but wait. That's not what the ticket is for. It's a ticket for not having my license plate attached to my front bumper. But here's the rub. I can't attach it to the front bumper without having my car bumper drilled. So me being the responsible person that I try to be, I placed my plate in my windshield. Oh, and that's a $75 ticket.

So, I got to thinking. I will fight this because I am fairly certain that if my rear light was busted out, I would not have received a ticket. I gotta find a cop to ask. Such bullshit.

Anywhoo.... next we drove down to the river.

Image courtesy of my boy.

It had been a warm day out and a few people lingered in the water. We walked down and tested the coldness of the water. Oooo, chilly!!! I found a freshwater clam shell, both sides intact. I had the boy grab it out for me. I love my boy!

And I would love to bring the monkeys down here. Maybe one at a time would be best. Probably better if I just forget that idea. 

And that concludes my Saturday. Thanks to the boy for the great pictures and his love!