Colorado On Fire

7*89--Aerial photos of the Black Forest Fire outside Colorado Springs, Colorado. (Photo by John Wark / Special to the Denver Post)

Okay, first, let me just say.... I DIDN'T DO IT!
Now that we have that out of the way, let's move on.

WOW!! The smoke around Denver is just, well, smokey! I can't even see the mountains!

Aside from it sucking from a homeowners point of view, where they just lost their house, belongings and sometimes their pets, it sucks for me too. Only because I am selfish and thoughtless to those suffering major losses. Because, why? You ask?

Because, without the mountains in my sights, I have no clue which direction I am heading. Oh, but use your GPS, you say. Well, phooey to that idea.

My GPS hates me and I swear, plots my demise constantly.
I want shortest route.
GPS heads me off a cliff.
I'm running behind to an appointment.
GPS takes me three miles out of my way.
I want to avoid a roadblock.
GPS sends me to a dead end.

Once, and I swear this is true. GPS asked me, "Are you in a building?"

NO YOU STUPID GPS!!! I'M RIGHT WHERE YOU DIRECTED ME!!!

GPS is a bitch!

On the plus side of the day, I have discovered the cure for hay fever and any nasal allergies.

But, first, I need a human guinea pig. Any volunteers?

I noticed that with the suggestion from Annie*s Granny, I did not smell any smoke. Because, if you recall, I had an issue with

I Love Baby Gays!

and it was suggested that I use Vaseline to coat the interior of my nostril. Using, of course, Baby Gays!

I don't smell any smoke!!! Awesome!!!

Which led me to think, if you have allergies and you coat the interior of your nose, using a Baby Gay with Vaseline, the pollen and such would get stuck and no allergy attack for you!

I think I'm pretty clever. Let me know how it works out!


Ps. I now have my son, calling them Baby Gays! I'm soooo trendy!